recursive christianity

it was this time last year that i was in mexico and God was providing from me 100% and i felt really really alive. i was thinking about how to rely on God fully in this bit of the world ....
It seems that vision and focus are very important, if I have a right image of Jesus (ie Him on a cross for me/you not an angry old man throwing lightening bolts or a chilled out hippy on a cloud not caring what happens, (a great sermon from ems duncan pointed this out)) and if I focus on that right image of Jesus spending time in intamacy, desiring spiritual gifts and developing fruits of the spirit, then passion will come and I can be a living sacrifice 100% of the time, and I can keep fighting to love people and give God the glory for EVERTHING. But the thing is to do this i need to Rely on God's strength and not just say things are fine cause this world tells us that if you havent got it all sorted there's something wrong.
so thats the recursion, to rely on God fully i have to rely on God fully (to strenghten me to do all those things). which might seem like its impossible (eg to make a computer you have to make a computer) but logic doesnt always work and time and space arent constant and God is all powerful, so ANYTHING is possible.
and if you think of it another way if you relying on God and bit then if you keep at it, you'll be lead to rely on God more and more.
sorry if thats all a bit head pickling but its kinda where im at :) g